BEING ALONE

I have a friend who says she has become a nerd cause she doesn’t go out or hang anymore with her buds. I told her I understood cause I was part nerd too and I realized that my blog gives the impression that I am always surrounded by excitement and people. But the fact is that I spend much time alone and cherish that. I don’t write about that cause what’s to say. “I am alone, thinking, reading, meditating…” Isn’t so interesting so my blog gives a false impression of my life. I identify with the bear who hibernates much of the time–in fact, has her cubs alone while she sleeps–but then needs to be social, playful. That’s me. I am alone a lot. I read a lot. I meditate. I love solitude. It’s different than loneliness. I am not always surrounded by excitement. That’s just what I blog about.

Anyway, I wanted to set that straight. I, too, am part nerd.

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65 Comments
  1. Even though I recently commented on your lifestyle taking my breath away because of your schedule, I somehow knew that a lot of the time you are alone. How would you cope otherwise?

    I used to be a kind of Corrie Bratter and all my friends used to be Paul Bratters. I was afraid to miss out on anything. But now I’m getting older it’s changing. And I love solitude. Being a flight attendant I spend a lot of time in hotel rooms alone. Wonderful. Boring for others. But we have our fun too. But then I have my loved one and loved ones when I come home.

    Jane, you inspire me every day wherever I am in the world. You are a blessing.

    Take care
    Jason

  2. you describe this – the One Woman perfectly
    Kind of nice – after a young marriage, 4 children and grandchildren – love being in my home in the woods. Solitude is wonderful!! You still lead a charmed life.

  3. My job involves working with the public all day every day, and as much as I love it, and the fact that I am part of a very large and close family, I love my time by myself. Being alone and being lonely are two different things.

  4. Completely relate! I think alone time is so healthy. My friends think my social calendar is constantly full but in truth I’m social when I’m social and alone when I want to be alone. I’ve always not answered the phone if I don’t feel like talking, which some people find outrageous!

  5. If you do find yourself in the the misery of loneliness, how can a person get out of it? Mother Teresa is quoted as saying, “Loneliness is the most terrible poverty.”

    I agree. Maybe it’s harder since I’m a little younger than you (38), but loneliness is unbearable.

    Thanks for this post.

    Good luck and best wishes.

  6. I absolutely, totally love solitude.
    As far as I’m concerned solitude is one of the most valuable of luxuries indeed!
    Reading, meditating, doing some yoga, meditating again…. Enjoying a glass of wine…That is real nourishment of the mind.

    Not that is not nice to out, or socialize (to a point). But to me the best of treats is solitude.

    One expects you to go out, you should, in fact, as visibility is part of the job. But how can you beat “recovering from visibility ” ?…LOL

    Life is good and that is what counts, that we know how to make it good, how to appreciate a good moment, a good though, a kind word .

    • I like that, Sil: “Recovering from visibility.”!!

  7. Thank you for this post. It seems our culture pushes activity to the point of not acknowledging the importance of alone time. I like knowing this piece about you. Your movies, both of them, sound like films I will definitely want to see.

  8. This is one of my favorite things you’ve shared about yourself! You never cease to amaze me! Sometimes you just go deep inside yourself and reveal something very personal! That’s beautiful!

    It must be difficult for you to be “on” and/or “visible” with all that you do a lot of the time! I just can’t imagine how hard it must be for you sometimes!

    So, I can understand how much you must relish having some time to yourself!!! Ahhhhh…solitude! It helps us all to rejuvenate ourselves!

  9. hi jane

    im a man from persia 30 years old , i had an especial life until now (some accidents,love,….all real ,its not normal in your countries some of them,now im a bussiness man in food line,but if you intrest i can send you this story.let me know

    with best regards

    hamid

  10. I just want to say I really appreciate your comment on ‘being alone’. I think we are all alone for most of the time but we often seek out others if we are not comfortable with ourselves. I really admire you and your comments on this. I have grown up with you and never feel alone when I identify familiar icons like yourself. You are a wonderful actress – keep going for our sakes.

  11. Hi Jane, I agree with the above comments; that said, your sharing here is significant, maybe even profound–whatever that word means? Today is my first day of retirement and after trying to clean out all the unnecessary treasures in our house (to the protestations of my wife) I made the decision to go camping at the rustic campground located at Michigan’s Reedsberg Damn–a teenage party spot which holds “good memories” for me. It is a place where the Muskegon River begins and where the Deadstream swamp ends, and that is a place full of Mother Nature’s pristine beauty. My plan is to camp for a week (that’s what I told my wife–but I’m preparing (me and my dog) for at least a month. I will drink a toast to you and yours while listening to the tuneful crickets and the snap, crackle, pop of the September campfire. Take care.

  12. Thanks for posting my comment Jane, and for sharing your blog. I prepared the following comment believing my first comment was not posted–my mistake! What follows is a description of what was for me a significant event while camping.

    In mid September, I walked across Reedsburg Dam (the beginning of Michigan’s Muskegon River) and followed the trail into the Deadstream swamp area of the Muskegon River backwaters. Eventually, I found a good campsite and the next morning, with the sun shining, the wind rustling through the tree branches, and my head spinning in the aromas of late fall, I walked down to the water’s edge. Gazing out across the water, the dozens of stumps and dead trees sticking up through the water underscored “wilderness.” As I began to walk back to camp, I stumbled upon a trail covered by overgrowth. In the middle of the trail I saw a gray fox staring out at me. Both of us waited for the sign–a noise or movement that would send one of us scurrying—but it didn’t come. Our contact intensified, and so did the warmth that I was feeling. The fox broke first, running in the opposite direction along the edge of the path. He kept looking back though; I suppose to see if I was really a threat. When he was totally out of sight, I was overcome with a feeling of total peace.

  13. Ahh. there is something magical about being alone. Re-energizing, peaceful, refreshing. Love it too but I too enjoy being with friends and family but do cherish my alone time.

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