As you can tell from my blog comments not to mention all the other internet activity circulating about the Toronto International Film festival protest letter that I signed along with 1500 or more friends and colleagues—there’s a lot of hatred spewing out there. I have not censored most of the hostile blog comments because I want to give space for the full range of voices. One of the hostile comments suggests that I wrote a follow up statement (released on the Huffington Post as well as on my last blog) because of pressure from Rabbi Marvin Hier with whom I met after I had begun composing my statement. What I said in my statement is true and I am not proud of it: I neglected to read the protest letter carefully enough. It was the outcry that ensued that caused me to study it very carefully. It was then that I saw that there were parts of it that I did not agree with. That is why I wrote my statement, not because I was pressured by anyone. It was a case of having to sit down, take a deep breath, go into a meditative state to clear away all the noise and zero in on my real feelings. I asked to meet with Rabbi Marvin Hier and others in the Jewish community to explain myself—why I was not taking my name off the protest letter but was issuing my own statement to clarify the things I didn’t agree with. I have learned a tremendous amount these last days and for that I am grateful. I’m also grateful for the outpouring of love and support..some from people I know, some from strangers. The statement of support from a group of Jews from Atlanta whom I don’t know made me cry. Then there’s the poem that Raeann McDonald wrote (it’s on this blog). She is the director of the retirement community in Oregon that Richard Perry’s mother, Sylvia, is a resident of. I got to know Raeann when she came to Los Angeles with Ms Perry. Such generosity and thoughtfulness!
One blog commenter asks how I maintain in the face of the hostility. It’s quite simply knowing who I am. That allows me to understand that what the attackers see is their problem and has nothing to do with me. I know my faults and try to own up to them but I also know I’m not what the venom-spouters think. It takes experience and age to stay confident in one’s reality—and to be free to admit when one has strayed from that reality, which was the case with some of the words in the TIFF protest letter.
Now I am back at my ranch, writing my book. There was a tremendous storm last night and the river is at least up a foot and very muddy. And—wonder of wonders at this early date—there’s a lot of snow on the mountains where the Santa Fe ski basin is. IT is soothing to be here and yesterday I took the most arduous hike since my knee was replaced. It was up the rocky slopes and through the fields that we cleared of trees 2 years ago. Lovely and diverse grasses and wildflowers now cover the ground that looked so barren after the trees were cut. I so adore the grasses here when the sunlight shines through them—so many varieties, most of them I know by name. The tree-cutting program is to conserve water, increase the grasses for the deer and reduce fire hazard. In this way, we restore the land to what it was before white Europeans arrived and began putting out forest fires. This high Chihuahuan desert used to be mainly savannah, not forest, and New Mexico simply doesn’t have the water to support an overgrowth of trees, much as I love them.
On that note, I’ll sign off. See you next time.
Nirmala Heriza
Jane, this is a song I wrote a long time ago inspired by a talk Swami Satchidananda gave on the universal human drama, diversities and constant dynamic transformations of life and the world affecting each one of us. The metatphor and personification he used to describe the ongoing phenomenon is derived from the eastern scriptures as Kala, the feminine manifestation of creation. The metaphor has always reminded me of you. I’d like to share it with you during this time while your mind, intellect and personna are again at the center of a profound prevailing storm that seems to be of biblical proportions.
Open you heart come dance with the world
it’s a wonderful merry go round but watch
very carefully her music can carry you up
and then carry you down
She’s loss and she’s gain
She’s joy and she’s suffering
Wherever we are she is found
She’s Kala the carnival
The mother and mistress
of sound
Her ways are beguiling, she’ll
trick you while smiling and carry
you home to the sea
She only intends to teach us to bend
She is holding us all on her knee
She’s constantly changing and always
arranging a new and a colorful play
Oh Kala the carnival dances the night
and the day
She’s dancing for Shiva The Lord of creation
He sits and He silently sings
While Kala the carnival
Dances the song for her King
Open your heart come dance with the world
It’s a wonderful merry go round
But watch very carefully
Her music can carry you up
And then carry you down
She’s loss and she’s gain
She’s joy and she’s suffering
wherever we are she is found
She’s Kala the carnival
The mother and mistress of sound.
She’s Kala the carnival
the mother and mistress of sound.
With love
Nirmala
.
Elizabeth
I am sorry you interpreted my comment as “hostile.” I still find it hard to believe that you, an intelligent person, signed something without reading it carefully. If you say it had nothing to do with pressure I believe you. Maybe you just change your mind a lot and that is the explanation for what happened…
as for the commenter who said
“I read your blogs because I am a fan. I don’t read them so I can argue or disagree with you.”
I believe the purpose of blogs is discussion. The concept that being a fan of someone means never disagreeing with them I find strange and un-American. I have also been a fan of your acting but if that was my only interest I would just rent your movies. I’m assuming you allow comments here because you want discussion.
Jane
Elizabeth, I agree. I do want discussion. RE not reading the protest letter carefully: I have been burrowed deep into writing my book. I sort of surface superficially to do what I have to do or to respond to life but it’s half-hearted. I scan mail, give cursorty responses, etc. I think that’s why I allowed myself to sign on without carefully reading.
Mary Jane Stone
Gary is a clod, an egotist, and a sexist. He is denying facts and accusing you of retreating to the best lifestyle money can buy. Phooey. Repubs live gold platedly and think it’s their due. Anyone who doesn’t fall in line with them and is above ordinary means is thought of by them as ‘hypocritical.’ This definition is really stretched to justify the lows that they will stoop to. And then there are their one-sided inaccuracies, which seem to go on forever. I love you Jane.
Nirmala Heriza
Jane, in view of all you’ve been going through, I felt like sending you another song. A lullabye. And wishing you sweet, peaceful dreams amid your beautiful healing mountains, trees, river, flower devas and wildlife.
Lullabye
Love will rise In the falling of the rain
Through all the joy and all the pain
Love will rise
Love will rise In the falling of a star
It makes no difference where you are
Love will rise
Softer than a lullabye
The song inside the Soul
The part of us that never dies
The part of us that’s Gold
Love will rise
Although your heart may feel like sand
While it’s slipping through your hand
Love will rise.
Love will rise
Although your heart may feel like sand
While it’s slipping through your hand
Love will rise.
With love
Nirmala
millie
“Read not to accept or reject, but to consider”
Have enjoyed and learned from bloggers’ comments here using this approach.
You have my best wishes and support.
leah
Don’t really get the negative comments Jane – i think you outlined your points really well – and it is obviously that you are against what they are doing at the Festival – not a whole people group!!! How is that hard to understand? I don’t get the critics!
happy writing – can’t wait to read you work!
be blessed
leah
Rosemary Gibbons
Jane,
You are doing an excellent job of clarifying yourself and thank you for reminding us that when others choose to spew venom at us, it is really about themselves, not us. I appreciate the way you articulate intelligently and help all of us to understand what is happening in the world.
Happy writing and enjoying the beauty of God’s creation.
Nirmala Heriza
Since my Guru left his physical body in 2002 and then the passing of my music producer, John Stewart, 2 years ago, I haven’t been able to pick up my guitar to sing for anyone. Or to write again. Until now.
Nirmala Heriza
Jane, I wrote this one today for you.
If the moon can’t shine
and the night goes blind
and the stars should tumble to the sea
If the sky falls through
I will stand by you
For as long as my heart can see
For as long as my heart can see
If the wind blows bad
and the world goes mad
and the rains start falling in between.
If the sky falls through
I will stand by you
For as long as my heart can see
If the sky falls through
I will stand by you
For as long as my heart can see.
Thank you.
With love.
Nirmala
Susan K.
You have been in my thoughts over the last ten days. Some of the comments have been so harsh by some people recently. That can be tough, I’m sure. Some people will always disagree with you, or dislike you whatever you say about these controversial issues, Jane, but you know that already. I thought what you wrote to the Huffington Post was very good. I like what you said about being in touch with who you are can help get you through a difficult time. That’s so true! I think one of the things I like about you the most is that you’re not afraid to admit it when you make a mistake. I wish more people were like that! Just wanted to let you know I agree with you on these issues and wish you well!