Yesterday I went to a friend’s baby shower. I hadn’t seen her since she was pregnant and when I saw her belly and her radiant face I began to cry. When I heard the words of wisdom her mother offered to her–to all of us–about how to raise a baby to be a happy, fully realized, person. I started crying again (and it wasn’t because I wanted to go back and redo the raising of my own kids all over again with more wisdom, though that did press in on me) . . . it was because her words moved me.

I’ve been in New York for the last five days workshopping Eve Ensler’s new play, OPC (Obsessive Political Correctness). Workshopping means actors reading the play, with a director to guide us, so the author can see what works, what needs changing, in the hope that, in time, the play will be performed for a mass audience. The afternoon of the last day, Friday, we performed for a small audience. The play is funny, very funny. A woman (me) wants to run for political office and launches a campaign. Her young daughter (Zoe Kazan) is a freegan, someone who buys nothing, who pays no rent but squats, who eats perfectly good but bruised, day-old food she finds in garbage bins. Freeganism is, in fact, an actual, real movement. The mother worries that her daughter’s eccentricities will hurt her campaign. The girl makes her mother a dress out of apricot, the kind that comes all rolled flat in cellophane like what we put in our kids’ school lunches The mother wears it for her campaign announcement and, in defense of her daughter, says proudly that it’s a reflection of the girl’s environmentalism, “Eat What You Wear” so to speak. The dresses become a humungous hit and start being mass produced in a variety of flavors but people wear them with diamonds and fur which is antithetical to what her daughter intended. With all its humor, the play has some profoundly important things to say about how we humans are destroying the planet with our greed and our waste and how we can/should be living differently. I started crying during my last speech when I tell my daughter what it feels like being in office, being taken seriously and I thank her for helping me and during the daughter’s final monologue about the species that are going extinct and oceans rising and what’s we human are doing to the planet I started crying and couldn’t stop and had to tilt me head back so people wouldn’t see. When the play was over I took Eve in my arms and sobbed for many minutes.

A few days, Roy Teeluk, who does me hair in New York, showed me “Ashes and Snow,” a book of photographs by Gregory Colbert (that is also a film made by him), photographs of elephants sitting with, praying with, bowing with, sleeping with young indian boys and other pictures of people swimming with whales. They are staggeringly beautiful and, again, I cried. Two days ago Gloria Steinem, in an email, told me that “. . . in Cherokee the word for “butterfly” and “elephant” is the same–because of the ears.” She went on to say, ” I wondered how the Cherokee knew that, since there are no elephants on this continent. But we all came from Africa–maybe it’s cellular memory” . . . and Tears came to my eyes.

I can no longer watch news stories or look at photos that show the killing of animals for greed. There was a TV story about the Japanese rounding up dolphins and killing them for food. I got ill. Can’t stomach it–literally.

I’m just mentioning a few of the many times in the last weeks and months that I have cried and it’s got me thinking: how come my tears are so close to the surface? How come pretty things, kind deeds, sad stories, acts of courage, good news, someone’s flax of insight, all get me crying or, at least, tearing up? The Fondas have always been cryers. My father once said, “Fondas cry at a good steak.” My son and daughter are the same. But I find my emotions are way more accessible than they were when I was younger and I’ve come to feel it has to do with age. I have become so wonderfully, terribly aware of time, of how little of it I have left; how much of it is behind me, and everything becomes so precious. With age, I am able to appreciate the beauty in small things more than when I was younger perhaps because I pay attention more. I feel myself becoming part of everything, as if I bleed into other people’s joy and pain. Maybe, without my being conscious of it, there’s the reality that in a few decades (if I’m lucky) I will be in the earth, fertilizing some of the very things I look at now and tear up over. (I’m not going to be cremated, uses up too much energy and gives off too many toxins, nor do I want to be in a coffin. Just dump me in a hole and let me morph into whatever as quickly as possible.) I ache for unwanted children in the world, for polars bears, and elephants, whales and Monarch butterflies, and dolphins, gorillas and chimpanzees. I remember reading once that biologist E.O. Wilson said something like, “God granted the gift of intelligence to the wrong species.” I’m paraphrasing but he explained, intelligence should have been granted to dolphins, for example, an animal with a brain who plays and is smart but has no thumbs and is not a carnivore.

I’ve listed sad things but what startles me even more is how I get emotional about nice things, like Kerry Washington’s belly and her mother’s words of wisdom and Elizabeth Lesser telling me about the new book she’s writing. Maybe because I’m older my heart is wider open, like a net that wants to catch all the things that matter. The first time I heard Jungian analyst and author, Marion Woodman speak, I went up to her afterwards and burst into tears. She took me in her arms and said, “It means your soul was touched.” Heart, soul . . . I don’t know which is which.. I suppose they’re the same basic thing and mine is/are so wide open I have to only wear waterproof mascara from now on.

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  1. I find this post hitting very close to home. The past month I have noticed I become teary eyed/cry with every happy or sad story I see on TV (coincidentally, finally saw The Butler last night, and drenched a hanky!), working with patients at the hospital, talking to my mom about memories…on and on. However, I hope it isn’t because my time is very limited here-as I am 27 years old! I think it can also be attributed to going through multiple, very trying aspects. Becoming aware of our being and others. I lost my sister a couple of years ago, have had to witness my mom become very ill and in pain, my own physical unwellness etc. After experiencing a period of numbness, I have reflected on how precious life is, and can empathize and have a heightened sense of being ‘touched’.

    Thanks for sharing your empathetic awareness Jane! Here’s to going with the flow (of tears) 🙂

    • Jane,

      You are crying because the Holy Spirit is showing you, you need to prepare for death. We are all born, and we all die, yet we are eternal beings. This life is short and has but one purpose to hear the gospel message (that Christ died for all of our sins) and to accept this gift of salvation.

      For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?
      Mark 8:36

      People who have accepted God’s gift of salvation LOOK FORWARD TO THEIR HOME GOING! They do not dread leaving this weary life behind. Yes God created a beautiful world for us to enjoy, but it is fallen and depraved. This world pales by comparison with what God has in store for those who love him:

      9 But as it is written: “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into
      the heart of man the things which God hath prepared for them that love Him.”. 1 Corinthians 2:9

      “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” Revelation 21:4

      “We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.” 2 Corinthians 5:8

      “O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?” 1 Corinthians 15:55

      For those who have accepted God’s Gift of Salvation, our glorious journey just begins at death!

      “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16

      Choose you this day which God you will serve.

      “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the
      door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” Rev. 3:20

      I hope you accept God’s offer, so your tears of sadness can be turned to tears of JOY! (And yes, you will see your beloved pets in Heaven too.)

      “I tell you ..there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” Luke 15:10

      Tomorrow is not promised to any of us. Only God knows the exact number of our days on earth.

      “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.” Psalm 139:13-16

      So make your choice today.

      God Bless You.

      • I just thought I would share these two little songs with everyone. They always touch my heart when I hear them. They are some of the very first Christian Songs written by hippies in the 1960’s after they got saved. These kids were naturally used to rock and roll, so they created these first Christian Songs in this familiar format when the Beach Boys and the Beatles were Big. This was the beginning of the Jesus Movement which swept across this country and saved so many. I was saved from this movement, albeit about 15 years later. Anyway these songs are very simple and straight from their hearts.

        You can only imagine what Chuck Smith must have thought when these little songs started popping up, probably a little nervous about their content in the beginning, but not a dry eye after they were sung. These little songs were the beginning of what we today call Contemporary Christian Music. Today there are literally thousands if not millions of contemporary Christian Songs still reaching people with the Timeless Gospel Message.

        The Little Country Church song was about Chuck Smith and his tiny little church (at the time).

        Welcome Back song begins with a testimony of a young hippy who tried all the other religions and came back to God.

        Ah, I am reminded of a scripture: Despise not small beginnings!

        Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin….Zechariah 4:10

        Love Song – Welcome Back

        Love Song – Little Country Church

        • One more, that I can’t listen to, without tears coming to my eyes:

          Love Song Baptism Music Video
          “Feel the Love”
          Video of the thousands of hippy flower children
          coming to saving faith in Jesus Christ
          and getting baptized in the Pacific Ocean in Corona Del Mar, CA

          A true move of God,
          a miraculous move of God
          in our life time.

    • TO JANE, Hello Jane, I’m not sure this is the appropriate place to ‘post’, but I’m giving it a shot, irregardless!

      You and I are cousins! Ironically, we have lived within close proximity of one another, a few times! My name is Lynne Fonda; I was raised in Pacific Palisades at the time you were living with (and married to) Tom Hayden. I moved to Malibu for 10 years, thereafter. When I Administrated the Big Sur Health Center, living in Monterey, you and Mr Turner had property above Pfeiffer Beach. I’m so surprised we didn’t run into one another, during all these years!

      Your father and mine, used to sit in Dad’s store, at the Brentwood Country Mart, and traced out our lineage; yet, you and I have never meant. Ironically, we are both into physical fitness. I trained and raced Triathlon, internationally. I would value meeting you! Presently, I am a Triathlon Coach; turning out gifted athletes! I moved to Colorado Springs, in 2004, to work with my NGB; I have a Team – “Fine Line Racing”.

      If you DO happen to read this, please know I have adored all your movies, and political persuasion!

      my email is: [email protected] You are a real asset to our Family’s ‘name’. I would love hearing from you!!

      Sincerely, Lynne Fonda (I can also be easily found, simply by’googling’my name. Keep up the marvelous work!! Best regards to you!!

    • Crying over the simple,beautiful,thoughtful things is a good thing!-we live in societies that don’t allow for real,honest expressions of the love of simple”,”common”things…all is sacred,no matter what religion or lack one has…like most of us,we’ve been taught to repress these feelings,and as we get older,we begin to sense WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT to us…so we become very sensitive,and we feel the loss of a wasted,to some degree,life..but it’s never too late to make it all worthwhile-just love,be kind,volunteer,or whatever it is one feels “called”to do for the benefit of humankind-or for ALL living things. Myhumble opinions,for whatever and whoever their worth!

    • Greetings

      • I am about 10 years younger than you are and am still feeling pretty positive about me and the world around me, but I also see the fragility of this stage we are walking into. There are times where i am still looking at what I am going to do when I grow up and this makes me wonder what I have left to do?? Politics keeps coming to the surface.
        Your trip to North Vietnam was an eye-opener for me….actually for all the people who were in my life at that time. I was in college as were all of my pals and we were searching madly for anything we could do to stop the killing on both sides of this awful war and Jane, we all respected you so much for taking that bone and running with it. All of us, EVERYWHERE, were looking for any solution to get attention directed at the killing and you did this….don’t you ever see this brave action as wrong because it was a bold move and needed a women who was brave to carry it out. The people who spoke out the loudest against you Jane were the people who stood to lose the most money……and money, as we know, is the thing that keeps all those wars going…..PROFIT is the bottom line!!
        I have just signed on today and look forward to your thoughts in the days to come….Lynda Belloma

  2. Jane, your words always captivate me. Years ago when I read your book (My Life So Far) your writing style made me feel as though I knew you – you became my friend.
    I enjoy your blog & understand just how you feel regarding tears so close to the surface. This happens to me, seeing a baby, receiving a simple “hello text” … From little things to major events , I’m easily overwhelmed with emotion

  3. Wow. That was beautifully written. Beautifully said. So often you write something in your blog that reminds me to slow up, appreciate the things around me, and look at things through a different lense. Thank you for sharing.
    What is your connection with Kerry Washington? Have you known her for a long time?
    This coming weekend I am taking a little trip to Los Angeles for a quick getaway. Looks like I will be bringing you folks the needed rain you have been looking for. I am staying at a hotel just a couple blocks away from the Vanity Fair Party on Oscar night. I know I won’t be able to get close to there, but it is fun to think that there will be a fabulous party right down the street. I love the Oscars. 🙂

  4. I also find myself tearing up at odd moments; moments when my heart is touched. My sister and I call it the tear factor such as when choosing a card or gift for someone. If the tears turn on we know we have made the right choice.

    Thanks for sharing your experience with us.

  5. Ms. Fonda,
    You are a wonderful Spirit, and a generous and caring role model, and have been so for many years. I am a big fan, and will never forget seeing you give a speech at USC in 1978, when I was a student there. Your speech had to do with giving back to the community and to society. You are experiencing many tears at this time, not due to your age, but due to getting more free. The freedom may come with age, in your case, but many never experience this freedom in their lifetime. The freedom is in ignoring others’ expectations and opinions, and in living your purpose from your heartfelt desires. I see this in the many humanitarian areas you are involved in and are speaking out in. Your tears are also a blessing. Every act of kindness touches someone. Continued blesses and peace to you.

  6. Age and time. Those two seem to go hand in hand. As a younger me, I didn’t have enough time to sincerely devote any time to appreciate beauty and wonderful events in life. It was always met merely with…….”Aww, how sweet!” Now, with my children grown and the daily need to cram in all that has to be done behind me, I can take the extra time to really enjoy what life has to offer. It does seem sad that so much time has passed, and I didn’t see a way to enjoy it all and accomplish what tasks I had ahead of me. However, we do have now. I am grateful to still wake each morning to see what the world has to offer. Tears…….let them flow in all the happiness and sorrows we encounter. We now have the time to embrace them. <3

  7. I got your response; thank you.. I was going to write again, but can’t seem to keep it short on paper.

    I am overwhelmed, and so my writing, I am sure, would be, too.

    You are a very kind person, Jane Fonda, and I appreciate you very much.

  8. Jane, I so respect and hear what you are saying.
    But remember 70 or 80 years is NOT all that our creator meant for us to have.
    Think about this, if a tree can live some four or five THOUSAND years does it make sense that we, humans that are capable of reflecting that wonderful creator in unique ways, only live such a short time on this planet that was especially designed for us?
    If fact, man was made to care for all the other grand creation, how could he do so if he dies BEFORE them?
    I makes no sense that the marvelous human brain be wasted by, not only using it in a limited way, but also for a limited time!
    Any sane, healthy human wants to live on because we simply were MADE to.
    Our future is a VERY bright one, here on an earth made perfect, just as God Jehovah, our creator planned from the very beginning.
    Check our for more info.

  9. I’ve become very weepy as I’ve gotten older too. It’s sometimes very disconcerting. A few years ago I took my granddaughter to the Christmas show at Radio City and sat there with tears running down my cheeks struggling not to sob. I’m not sure why I reacted that way – the music was soaring, the stage event was happy, and there my granddaughter sat totally enthralled. It all brought me to tears. She looked at me at one point and said, “Are you crying?” All I could do was nod and she went back to watching the show. I’m still hard pressed to put my finger on the cause. Orchestral music does it to me too so maybe that was it. And, when Santa came out, it got worse. I mean, what the hell? It’s embarrassing at times. But something touches me deep inside and the tears just start gushing. There’s no stopping it. I guess it’s like the Fonda tendency to cry at a good steak. Baffling.

  10. Yes Jane. Yes, yes, yes. I wish I could read this and think “what the heck is Jane talking about! I don’t understand!” But, I do.

    Unfortunately at 60+ I’m right behind you. I am only now realizing that until recently I’ve been identifying with people much younger. For instance although I’ve been in menopause for what seems like an eternity – I was still identifying with people who have babies. Only recently did the light bulb click on and I thought “Hey, wait a minute – I’m TWICE the age of these women!”

    Not a few years older – not a “little too old” to have a baby – I’M TWICE – DOUBLE – TIMES TWO as old.

    I see things and often think “Oh, look they are building a new city – I wonder if I’ll be around to see it?” And if I’m around will I be well? Healthy? Will I want to be around?

    We have children Jane that were good friends many years ago (seems like most of my life was many years ago) Ian Sinclair, my step son and your son spent a reasonable amount of time together, they went to the same school in Santa Monica…this was a couple of marriages (for both of us) ago.

    My 95 year old “Nana” died and last week, the anniversary of her birthday, I was looking at her photos. She ALWAYS had a smile. A BIG SMILE. Ear to ear. She was always the first ready to go anywhere. She didn’t care where you were going – if you were going somewhere she was dressed, ready and waiting on the porch. She refused to talk about death or not being around and didn’t slow down until the last couple of months….even then she had the smile but something in her eyes changed. I never saw her cry. NEVER. She didn’t have an easy life in fact she had my mom as 16 unmarried – so she had a very difficult life – the man who got her pregnant was Lebanese and his family had arranged his marriage with a cousin. Although they stayed in touch for 70+ years only the two of them and my mother knew about it.

    As I see friends begin to get sick and peers, Harold Ramis for example, die, I think this can’t be true.

    I’m suddenly realizing – what an iota of time we are here. When they talk about the earth being 4.5 BILLION YEARS OLD….we are not even a grain of sand or a drop in the ocean. We are so insignificant in some ways, YET we seem to have such purpose while we are here.

    The older I get – the faster it goes. When I was a kid summer seemed to last forever. Now it’s Christmas, or my birthday, every time I turn around. Seems like it should be the opposite – that once we are old enough to “get it” and understand that the seconds should be cherished it only seems fair that time should slow down, not speed up.

  11. I can relate to this Blog. I recently was diagnosed with Vasculitis and am going through a rough treatment. I am only 41 and otherwise a healthy person. It scared me to get this diagnosis and made me very aware of “time” suddenly. I always have been a cryer as well, and come from a family of cryers, but ageing, illnesses, watching your children grow up, parents age, grandparents die…. it all suddenly felt like a fast forward movie….

    Thanks for sharing.

  12. Jane, I sure can identify with all of what you’ve said about crying and a growing sense of feeling connected to others and feeling strong emotions. As a 73 year old male who was taught that “big boys don’t cry, I’m now experiencing exactly what you’ve described. Thank you for spelling it out so well.

  13. Keep writing, Ms. Fonda. Your soul is SO worth sharing! Love you!

  14. It’s called LOVE, a love for life, the universe, the things that really matter. And you’ve got a huge amount.

  15. I’m so glad I saw this. It happens to me too. Ever since my daughter was born I have noticed how easily I come to tears – over sad things of course, but also so often over the joyful, nostalgic or touching things that happen around me. For a long time I tried to hide my tears, choke them back, or down… It’s only in the last few years that it has occurred to me that letting the tears flow frees me to really understand what I’m feeling and how I am connected to my life and my family and my friends – and how deeply precious these connections are. I’m not certain when this started whether the tears were born out of fear or something else, but now when my daughter asks why I’m crying, it’s often I can tell her “it’s because I’m so happy and I love you so much.”
    Thank you for sharing. I hope I get to see that play.


    Dear Jane,
    Joshua 14:10 (Caleb says)”Now behold, the Lord has let me live, just as He spoke, these forty-five years, from the time that the Lord spoke this word to Moses, when Israel walked in the wilderness; and now behold, I am eighty-five years old today. 11 I am still as strong today as I was in the day Moses sent me; as my strength was then, so my strength is now, for war and for going out and coming in.”

    Caleb says he is 85 with the strength and vigor of a 40 year old!

    Why is this important? Because it’s in response to a question I asked of the Bible Code computer program.

    And here’s the 6 minute youtube video link showing how it was found.

    “Biblecode “Suggests” Reverse Aging Possible”

    I believe that by using clues found within the Bible Code computer program it is possible to “Reverse Aging” and find a cure for paralysis/spinal injuries. Many other cures and science discoveries may be found as well.

    I had had small “Spiritual experiences” in my life and so I tried using the Bible Code computer program in Oct. 2002 to see if there was any “truth” in it. There was.

    A personal “Event” was predicted in the B.C. that came true 6-7 months later in May 2003. For fun, I tried looking up food cures in the B.C. for certain diseases. Looking on the Internet I then found that the foods being “suggested” were being called “Superfoods” and were having success in University studies on the very same diseases.

    In Sept. 2010 “signs” came that suggested Paralysis and spinal injuries could be cured via clues within the B.C.

    It’s a long story, so I’ll be blunt.

    I believe God will allow Aging and Paralysis cures to be found via the Bible Code to try and change the hearts and minds of the Men who have the power to start and stop wars to stop trying to destroy Mankind and instead do good and love one another.

    In April(25)and May 2012 possible “signs” started appearing in a continuous slow drumbeat that strongly suggest we are on the brink of the Biblical Apocalypse and “Rapture” happening.

    I’ve been documenting these events at my Twitter page biblecodecure@biblecodecure because you can use a diary in a Court of Law as evidence.

    It seems God is sending a warning and the Bible says that He doesn’t want to bring Judgement.

    My challenge to the “powers that be” is, from the point that the resources are gathered all together, within one year’s time a cure for paralysis will be found. The cure for Aging is extra incentive. You won’t be immortal and you may still only live to the Bible limit of 120.

    I have evidence and proof to back up my claims.

    Jane, you know many powerful and influential people. These powerful people are also potentially dangerous and could harm me, so this is not something that is a joke to me. I believe all I say. I need you or someone like you to at least hear me out and try to get the “powers that be” involved so that we can avoid worldwide calamity.

    Jesus performed miracles. I’m not Jesus, but it would make sense that the more important you are to this cause, the greater the likelihood that we will have some kind of spiritual experience together.

    I believe God is watching what we do and can prevent calamity if He sees we are trying but I don’t know for how much longer.

    Since April 2012, North Korea threatened Nuclear war. Last Summer the USA backed down from WW3 in Syria. And in just the last few days, WW3 may start over the Ukraine.

    Yet, the Bible Code suggests things may be “synchronized” and that God STILL wants the Paralysis Cure to be attempted.

    And when it comes to the name “Jane”, I have seen off-shoots of somebody with that name perhaps being involved in my life, “Jana”,”Jania”,”Jane”.

    So, Jane, how about it? You can think of it as Adventure or Entertainment if you like.

    I’m 47 and I’d love to get my 18 year old body back. How about you?

    At the very least, if you seek to have a real life “Spiritual experience” I think I can help make it happen.


    • Dear Jane,
      to show you “Reverse Aging” AND “Life Extension” are not just fantasy, the Internet company “Google, Inc” in Sept. 2013 formed a new company “Calico”. The name Calico is shorthand for California Life Company. Calico is an independent biotech company established in 2013 by Google Inc. with the stated goal of focusing on the challenge of combating aging and associated diseases.

      Ray Kurzweil has been hired to run things there.
      Wikipedia says: “In 2002 he was inducted into the National Inventors Hall of Fame, established by the U.S. Patent Office. He has received nineteen honorary doctorates, and honors from three U.S. presidents. Kurzweil has been described as a “restless genius” by The Wall Street Journal and “the ultimate thinking machine” by Forbes. PBS included Kurzweil as one of 16 “revolutionaries who made America” along with other inventors of the past two centuries. Inc. magazine ranked him #8 among the “most fascinating” entrepreneurs in the United States and called him “Edison’s rightful heir”.”

      Ray Kurzweil was at the February 2012 first Global Future 2045 Congress held in Moscow. There, over 50 world leading scientists from multiple disciplines met to develop a strategy for the future development of humankind.

      “2045: A New Era for Humanity” is a very well done 7 minute video from them showing a timeline of what they think will happen in the future. You may need to view it a couple of times to get a good understanding, but in the end they think they will be able to make a person immortal. These are some of the best minds and most powerful people behind this, so this is no joke.

      I would like you to help me meet with people such as these and others, as I believe I can do some of the things they want, faster, cheaper, for the good of all Mankind and glorify God at the same time.

      Please watch and let me know what you think.

      Sincerely, Jimmy

  17. It’s a phenomena of aging. I’ve found the same and I’m a few years younger than you. I have a dear friend who is quite active at 90 and she has the same thing. I have always loved that there is a sisterhood amongst women, in that we share things like this and realize we’re not crazy or weird or unusual…..we’re just being women.
    Here’s a strange little thing that happened to me a very long time ago, though I’ve never forgotten it. I was crying at the kitchen table as my then husband and I were figuring out our divorce, it was a total mismatch and needed to happen. He never complimented me, but at that particular moment he looked at me and said your eyes are beautiful when you cry. Then he left the room…..I went to look in a mirror still sobbing and he was right… eyes were beautiful….but he noticed too late.
    I met you, sort of, at the Women as Global Leaders in Dubai in around 2007 or 8. I remember you had to leave early as your sister passed away. My husband (the newer and good one) was one of the administrators at Zayed University at the time. You gave a wonderful speech that day, you were constantly surrounded by the students, I was never able to speak to you though we stood right next to each other. In just the last year, sadly, that university has turned a 360 and is now repressing the girls again, going back to their more traditional ways. They had evolved so much and we had such high hopes for the future of women in the Middle East.

  18. Jane,
    Following Jack Benny’s advice, I now list my age in waves of 39, i.e., I am now in my41sr 39th birthday year. So, I think about my own mortality with some frequency. In my blog ( (shameless promotion, I know, but . . .) I penned the following. I thought you might find it useful.
    –I stood outside on our porch one morning, just the other day. I often come out early, as the sun is rising, just to look. As I stood there, I began thinking; someday this will all be gone. I will no longer stand here looking out at the sky and the trees, and the houses with their residents just beginning to awaken. It will all be gone.
    Then I corrected myself.
    No, one day, it will remain, and only the image in my brain will be gone. But if there is no image in my brain, does it actually exist, this thing I now see? It’s the old, “if a tree falls in the forest and there is no one to hear it, does the tree actually fall? Perhaps, if I am no longer here, then nothing exists.

    So then, what are we all doing here? Are we all simply sitting around, waiting for Godot?
    I think of the expression about people who, “are simply taking up space.” That is, they aren’t doing anything useful, but what is useful anyway? Is useful getting up in the morning, strapping on a vest filled with dynamite, driving to some crowded marketplace, and then detonating the vest?

    Is useful deciding to feed a hungry child?

    Is useful, then, a relative term, meaning, in the final analysis, exactly nothing?
    In a million years, would being useful matter?

    We fuss about such terminally stupid things, like whether two people of the same gender should be allowed to marry, while ignoring the fact that half of the “correctly married” will eventually divorce one another, some after great stress, and even violence. But of what consequence are such things anyway? Will the earth cease to rotate if we do one thing and not another?

    Did it matter that Adolph Hitler decided to kill six million people simply because they were Jews, or Gypsies, or some other condition he deemed un-Germanic?
    Well, it turns out that it did matter, but only briefly, and only to the people he killed, and the people who loved the people he killed. In a million years, Hitler will be as though he never existed. He’s the tree that fell in the forest while no one was around to see it or hear it fall. And the people he killed will also be as though they never existed.
    What matters then is the moment . . . now. And the only moment that matters is that which I perceive.

    And if I act, always act, so as to create beauty, then for those brief moments that I exist, I may fulfill the only possible purpose for which I exist. And if I understand that beauty exists in many forms—a work of art surely, but also the smile of a child, the caress of a loved one, the rising of the sun, or its setting, the low whirring of a hummingbird’s wings as it caresses your path. These matter, even if only for the briefest moments.
    For those moments, I truly exist.. .

  19. Jane
    Such an honor to comment here.
    Interesting about the tears – what a better way to celebrate life and its little times that hit our hearts. If we could not find tears, that would be a worry. My best friend, a New Yorker, and I saw you in “33 Variations” when on Broadway. How do you think you could have ever played your part if you would not be able to be in touch with your tears of today? My friend died last fall at the age of 69 in New York. When I think of us sitting in the theater I can almost feel my friend’s tears as we watched you on stage. Little did we know then that my friend would be facing her end of life here, on earth, within her timeframe of life, much sooner than ever expected. Her tears, as yours, are a universal gift. They are meaningful, they are maybe the closest communication we have between our mind and body; they are a very important part of our lives. Yes, Crying is one of the best communication methods we have. God Bless our Tears…our humanity.

    • Georgia, YESSSSSS!!!! So many people posting such beautiful, profound things. xx

  20. I had to register just to comment, having read a news story about your “Crying” entry above. Read the comments after the story too. Boy there’s a lot of hate in the world.
    But that’s not what this is about. The news story led me to wonder if you are religious or…, and I quickly found your “About my Faith.” What a wonderful piece that is, not only because of the great Sufi poem you offer up but also because your spiritual journey has so many similarities with mine. For instance you talk about coming to understand that your striving for perfection did little more than disembody you. A friend of mine frequently says he was always trying to be something more than he was, and all he succeeded at was missing out on who he actually was and is.
    But to the point. In the support group I’ve been part of for the last 27 year, at times I hear some people wonder out loud if perhaps God is getting credit for some things that should be instead credited to time or the passing thereof. Maybe, sometimes, the opposite is true; maybe, sometimes, we give time credit that should go to God. Maybe your emotion is more to do with gratitude, a gratitude that comes with the understanding, perhaps at some level deep, deep inside and therefore barely conscious, that God is doing for you what you could never do for yourself. Maybe you’ve really begun your dance with God. Maybe you are on The Way.
    And maybe I’m just preaching to the choir, huh. Maybe you realize exactly that and chose to leave it unsaid. God bless.

  21. Jane,

    This is my first response to your blog. Came across a news item in today’s email on your ‘Crying’ post.

    I’m just short of a decade behind you and wondering if the same tears are waiting for me out there in the future!

    Reviewed your book, My Life So Far – How Surreal It Can Get {Must Grok}, so the reference to your blog was intriguing.

    Certainly Solomon’s observation is confirmed, ” To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance…” {Eccl. 4:1 & 4}.

    Your perfect to play Mara, an olde fishwife, in “Orleon,” or film “A time to Dance.” The first takes place on the continent of Atlantis, the second has only played in my mind. The first has been read across the world for decades and never seen. The second is dangerously close to moving from conception to inception.

    A final thought. Could the tears be your not stopping to take a breath (lol)? Till the Shout.


    • Terry, NO!! on the contrary. The tears come from taking time to stop, to be in the moment. I meditate. I am present for life’s beauties. You got me all wrong, darlin’ but I love the reminder which is so apt of Solomon. Thanks.

      • Jane,

        Your more than welcome. Yes, I love Ecclesiastes especially.

        And that’s wonderful to hear, about being in the moment. Takes me back to the acting days.

        For me the exciting thing now about ‘being here now’ is that His Mercy is new every morning!

        Was in earnest about the play and the film idea. You’re can use ‘[email protected]’ for contact. That’s the email for our website, We’re hoping to upgrade it.

        And you would make a dynamite Mara. Till the Shout!


  22. Beautiful Post. You are an amazing, beautiful person and an inspiration to many of us. There is always a reason why one finds themselves to unexpectedly cry and get emotional… sometimes it’s because you deeply “resonate” with the joys and sorrows of an encounter, and sometimes it’s because it “triggers” an emotion of unresolved feelings/emotions. This helps us grow spiritually.

    Tears flowed one day when I saw a friend’s daughter pregnant belly, and that moment, it hit me that I could no longer bear a child. I was filled with joy for her and simultaneously felt a series of emotions & memories…

    Sometimes tears flowed unexpectedly when I saw a happy couple together… it finally made me realize that I did not have a good marriage and could not change it (he was cheating on me & I was in denial)…

    Someone once told me “When the student is ready, the teacher appears”…

    I love reading Inspirational Quotes, especially from Ralph Waldo Emerson…

    “To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”
    Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882);
    Philosopher, Poet, Author, Essayist

    Thank you for sharing your post. You are such an inspiration to me the way you have aged so beautifully and gracefully, and have been such an accomplished woman….

    • Mary, thank you for reminding me of that gorgeous Emerson poem!!!

  23. And here I thought it was only me. I’m in my early 70’s, still as active, concerned and connected as I was back in the 60’s. And I find that any acts of kindness, connections between people, surprising deeds that change the world…I just feel the dew dropping from my eyes. I hope I don’t stop having these feelings because I fought damned hard to help make many changes in the social and human condition over the past 50 years…don’t need credit, I see the changes happening in front of me. Maybe they’re tears of relief and joy…whatever they are, I’m glad your hard work over the years, accepted or not by all, are the fountain from which your tears are born. And keep on letting the world know that you are an actor to be honored, admired and appreciated as much as your humanity….

    • Neil, yes, they are so much more often tears of joy than of sorrow. My blog seems to have been misinterpreted by some as ‘crying over my growing old.’ NO!!!! My growing old has made it easier to be close to my heart.

  24. When I first started having these tears for what seemed no reason at all (or at least something that hadn’t made me cry previously), I too was baffled and embarrassed. I had to wait to leave movie theatres till everyone else had exited or was unable to look to the side at the person sitting next to me while watching TV, or hearing a song on the radio. Recently tears flowed dozens of times while watching the Olympics and not even just during the competition or young people raising their hands in triumph over some of greatest obstacles in sports, but also seeing the diversity of the crowd in the plaza, the pairs skaters, and the Olympic flame.

    I remember years ago when I used to make fun of my older brother who teared up at the opera almost every time an aria began. I didn’t understand it then.

    But after I started to experience these spontaneous and virtually uncontrollable tears, I began to realize these were soul tears, My spirit was touched. My mirror neurons were firing. My empathy was ablaze. The pinnacle of joy was being attained…all from my living room. What a blessing to be able to feel so deeply and be so moved by circumstances. Our connection to the world and the universe is being celebrated.

    • YES!!!! Rey, and I cried during the Olympics too. Aren’t those athletes just something. Whew! They all show such generosity. It must come with the territory of greatness.

  25. And why was so much of the blog rewritten and the stuff directly about Kerry and her shower taken out?

    • Adele, I hadn’t asked permission. My bad

      • Jane, reading your post has made me extremely depressed. I try not to dwell on death, but after reading your post, I feel extremely down and can’t stop thinking about it. I had breast cancer almost 7 years ago, when I was just 26. I try not to think about death so much. I am trying to move on with my life. But after reading your post, and the depressing comments here, i can’t stop from crying. I wish I would have NEVER allowed this letter to get me so down. I don’t know why you would even post something like this to the internet for others to read anyhow. What did you expect to accomplish by posting this letter here? Your post did not help me at all. It just intensified my fear of dying even more.

        • Goddness, Latoya, my blog about crying wasn’t abut death or fear of death and most of the people I’ve heard from took it as I intended. Life becomes more precious with age. I am reacting to small things more, beauty, kindness, and well as cruelty move me more. This is not depressing.

  26. Ms Fonda I will turn 80 this June 15 ~ I cry a lot ever since I got involved with 12 Step programs over forty years ago, Most of the time either my wife Linda or I turn to each other and see who has something to wipe our tears away. First of all I must admit that I fell in love with you about the time I saw Barbarella. Shortly after that I was smitten by Brigitte Bardot and Sophia Loren, who is my exact age. Well nothing ever happened with you three so at the age of forty-nine I married for the first and only time my wife Linda and now thirty one years later we have six fantastic grandchildren and probably great-grand kids shortly. I am saying all this to let you know that you remain one of my heroes on a very short list. I am a full-time Peace Activist, a U.S. Army Veteran and active in numerous Peace and Justice groups. Over a year ago I attempted to reach you through Jodie Evans of Code Pink and I was told that since you were in New York at the time and not here in LA that she was not able to get in touch with you. So this idea that I have been sitting on for about one year has developed to a critical mass and now that I have found you, hopefully we can communicate and it is possible if this plan works out it could have the potential of gaining a Nobel Peace Prize, for all the persons involved. Check out my Facebook Profile at/ John P. Jack Finley /and if what you see there is of interest please get back in touch with me so we can save our world one person, one day at a time ~ There is no money involved and I have no secrets or ulterior motives,but what I have in mind originally occurred to me in 1968 shortly after my boss, Dr. Martin Luther King was assassinated ~ My email address is on file with my info that I posted when I joined this blog ~ Namaste

  27. Well, Jane, you are in a very crowded boat. I’m not much of a crier, myself. Growing up African-American in an all white town quickly taught me that in order to survive I had to appear stoic, strong and ever capable. At 57, I still don’t cry much, but the anxious feeling of time’s finiteness ebb’s close to the surface. And the animals? Like you I do not watch any show that depicts harm to animals. I can no longer watch de Sica’s heart wrenching “Umberto D” for the same reason. However, I refer you to a wonderful essay by Jonathan Franzen entitled “Liking Is For Cowards. Go For What hurts” (I’m betting you’ve already read it.) It gave me badly needed perspective on my anger, my default mode when faced with things I cannot change: the dying animals, the loss of my parents, a young patient’s death, the end of my dreams, etc. I cannot change the world, but I can love my birds, my pets, my partner, give food from my garden, watch a splendid film and live. Jane, you have been lucky to have the resources and energy to make lives better. Generations of young women will benefit from your work to prevent teen pregnancy, thousands were emboldened to stand against unjust war because of your youthful courage, millions remain physically active as they age because of you and of course, your image flickers across the screen in so many wonderful films. Jane, you are a force of nature. Keep crying-somebody’s got to do it. P.S. Glad your dad didn’t cry when I met him years ago, it would have spoiled the photo!! My best to you. When you see Matt next, tell him “Hello” from April.

  28. hi Jane,
    the first time I am doing meditation, I cried immediately !…we feel a lot more things and it’s natural.
    you release all the tensions and events of the past. I had these feelings’s normal when we do meditation.
    Now, everything is so difficult in the world and we fell that.
    Also, you are a great person with a noble soul ! and that’s why we love you.
    Take care of you. xxx

    • Florence, funny that you mention that. Sometimes when I meditate, tears pour down my face.

      • I’m not surprised ! I was like you at first.
        are the tensions that come, and after you cry no more. It feels all clean inside!

  29. This was real and raw and I enjoyed reading it. Crying is one of my favorite bodily functions. Yes, I know that’s sounds weird but I don’t give a damn because it’s the truth.
    Crying, laughing, and climaxing are essential bodily functions. So many health benefits! (I threw in laughing and climaxing because they are too important to me to leave out.)
    I think I’d become depressed without regular crying, laughing, and climaxing. My mind and soul have lived 33 years in this body on this planet. I plan on keeping the good stuff going as long as I can!
    I know many have heard of Eat, Pray, Love. I’d like to read a good memoir called Cry, Laugh, Climax. 🙂
    Enough about that. Cheers to crying!

  30. This evening, I decided to screen for my neighbors one of my favorite movies – Sturges'”The Lady Eve.” OMG, we laughed our butts off. It was the perfect anodyne for this year’s (continuing) brutal winter. And those Edith Head costumes! Your dad and Barbara Stanwyck seemed to exude a real chemistry between them. I wondered if this was true? Too bad, he never worked with Sturges again.

    Stay warm.
    April in Ann Arbor

  31. I had a major epiphany moment yesterday.

    I was driving on the freeway on my way to a tennis match. It was not a sunny day. The sky was all clouds and there was a 30% chance of rain.

    Something happened to me that has only happened one other time in my life. I felt a sense of elation about life. I felt SO alive. The funny thing is, for decades I’ve been wondering if I would ever have the chance to feel that way again.

    It came about as I was in thought about issues I’ve been struggling with and how these issues are tied into my sense of belonging to each other person and being on the planet, and genuinely wished the same for everyone else. As weird as it my sound, I saw what appeared to be a small animal on the side of the freeway, obviously killed. I thought, that poor little being was just going about living their life and their life was ended due to other beings perception of “progress”. And then I thought this planet belonged to them long before it belonged to us, and yet our need for what we perceive as advancement has caused other beings their lives. I actually felt that I was that little being on the side of the road’s brother, and that I had let them down by being so fixated on progress and infrastructure.

    I was sad, but strangely enough, it’s what made me feel so alive because at that moment is when I felt connected to EVERYTHING. Every person, every animal, every plant, every tree. I cried a very strange type of cry. It was as if I were so alive, and felt so much power and emotion due to it that I wanted to throw up at the same time due to so much emotion and elation running through me. And the sky, completely clouded, seemed almost to have a neon light type of glow to it.

    I got to the courts, played my doubles match, probably the best I think I’ve every played in my life. There were two other players in the match that were rated a level above me, and yet they were kind of blown away that I was playing at the level of tennis I was. We won the match easily, and I was amazed at how relaxed, confident, focused, and connected I was during the match.

    By chance, right next to the courts, there was a park where they were having some kind of dog show. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love dogs. When my match was over, I walked over to the park and just looked at all the beautiful little Angels there were. It made me smile, non-stop.

    I walked up to a couple of ladies and asked them about their dogs. One of the ladies gave me a couple of treats to give to her dog. I gave them to him. They asked about why I was there, and I explained about the tennis match and how I travel for different matches in the USTA. We chatted for quite a while. She asked what I did for a living and I told her, and then she remarked that it was so unusual to her that someone just walks up to a total stranger and starts talking to them. She meant it in a good way. Oddly enough, I realized at that moment that I never used to be that way years ago. I was always so sheltered and on the defensive, and realized that I finally got to the point in my life where it didn’t matter any more and that I genuinely loved knowing other people and interested in their life paths.

    Impulsively, without even thinking about it, I said “Well, we all belong to each other, yes?” After the words came out, I actually realized what I just said, and why.

    She looked at me, gave it a beat as if to absorb and compute what I just said, and then smiled.

    I smiled back, and left.

    I was so blessed to have that moment of appreciation of the gift of life we’re all given.

    Talk about having a good day………


      • Thanks, Jane.

        This whole shift from decades of my own self-absorbedness and fear to the awareness and appreciation of everyone and everything around me is what I’m dubbing my “renaissance of the heart” as I turned 50.

        It’s as if I became unplugged from the matrix, and I’m able to see that I was born with my own built-in Bible. The real one. The true one. The one that shares the same light with everyone and everything. The one that leads me from the heart.

        It’s actually one of the factors of this new path that led me to your website. It was the connection.

        I believe in you and I believe in the work you do.

        All in the quest for absolute truth and love, yes?

        Cyber-hug and good light to you.

  32. Dear Jane,
    I want to thank you for reading my posts. I believe God has brought us together by inspiring you to write about your crying and how you aware of aging and mortality.

    I know how crazy and unbelievable it must sound to you for me to say I think I can cure paralysis/spinal injuries and reverse aging using the Bible Code computer program.

    But the more you know, the more you will understand why I believe what I believe. There is much to say but I can’t write a book here so I will try to tell you why curing paralysis is important.

    In Sept. 2010, when I got the “signs” that suggested I could be able to cure paralysis using clues from the Bible Code, I didn’t know why God would want paralysis cured. I reasoned that for God to show these “signs” something very important was happening. God was taking action!

    Why is curing paralysis important? I had to look to the Bible to find out why.

    Luke 5:24 “But, so that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins,”—He said to the paralytic— “I say to you, get up, and pick up your stretcher and go home.” 25 Immediately he got up before them, and picked up what he had been lying on, and went home glorifying God.”

    By curing a paralyzed man Jesus proved He was God! To the Hebrews only God could forgive Sin and you had to go to the Temple to get that.

    If I cure paralysis/spinal injury with clues from the Bible Code, it is only by Jesus that I was led to do it! I’d be glorifying God and Jesus by finding the cure. And God would allow it to happen for that very reason.

    But that’s not all! To see the “Glory of God” you must look at his BACK!

    Exodus 33:18 “And Moses said, I beg you, show me your glory.
    20 And God said, You can not see my face; for no man shall see me and live.
    21 And the Lord said, Behold, there is a place by me, and you shall stand upon a rock;
    22 And it shall come to pass, while my glory passes by, that I will put you in a cleft of the rock, and will cover you with my hand while I pass by; 23 And I will take away my hand, and you shall see my BACK; but my face shall not be seen.”

    The “Glory of the Lord” ran up and down a man’s loins!

    Ezekiel 1:27 “And I saw something like the color of amber, like the appearance of fire enclosed around it, from what appeared to be his loins upward; and from what appeared to be his loins downward, I saw what appeared to be fire, and it had brightness around it. 28 As the appearance of the bow that is in the cloud in the day of rain, so was the appearance of the brightness around it. This was the appearance of the likeness of the GLORY OF THE LORD.”

    FINALLY, when looking up the situation involving paralysis I came upon THIS in the Bible Code.

    Isaiah 58:6
    “Is not this rather the fast that I have chosen? to loose the chains of wickedness, to undo the bands of the yoke, and to let the oppressed go free, and to break every yoke? 7 Is it not to share your bread with the hungry, and that you bring the poor, who are cast out, to your house? When you see the naked, that you cover him; and that you hide not yourself from your own flesh?

    8 Then shall your light break forth like the morning, and your HEALTH shall spring forth SPEEDILY; and your righteousness shall go before you; the GLORY OF THE LORD shall be your REAR GUARD. Then shall you call, and the Lord shall answer; you shall cry and He shall say, Here I am.”

    I tell you the cure/”Health” will be found “Speedily”. Notice the “Glory of the Lord” is your “REAR GUARD”, your BACK! And what is the end result of all this? You shall call and the Lord shall answer, “Here I am.”!!! YOU FIND GOD! GOD EXISTS!

    Jane, I hope you understand more now. I hope you can see why I believe that this could work if we try.

    Let’s do it!

    Sincerely, Jimmy

    • Dear Jane,
      in case anybody gets confused, in early Christianity, the Roman Emperor was God in the Empire. To say Jesus was God or “King” was to be against the Roman state, and dangerous to do.

      Jesus was God incarnated, God made flesh and blood.

      God exists in 3 forms says the Bible, The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. It’s like H20/water can be a liquid/water, a solid/ice, or a gas/steam.

      Because Jesus was tortured and died an innocent man, no human can say to God that God does not know what it’s like to be a human being and to suffer.

      But Jesus’ death was also a ransom/sacrifice to redeem all Mankind; He paid the price of your Salvation.

      He also OVERCAME Death! He died and came back to life proving Death is not the END. Which would serve to let you live a freer, richer life and take more chances instead of living in fear of Death constantly and never leaving the house!

      Jesus is still alive today and forever more!

      One day Jesus will return for all the World to see, but not because He wants to, He will HAVE TO; so says…

      Matthew 24:21
      21 “For then there will be a great tribulation, such as has not occurred since the beginning of the world until now, nor ever will. 22 Unless those days had been cut short, no life would have been saved; but for the sake of the elect those days will be cut short.”

      And this is also why I need Jane to help me change minds with miraculous cures before it’s too late!

      Sincerely, Jimmy

  33. Beautifully written…Thank you!
    I guess age gives us a perspective of appreciation that nothing else can…
    I feel it also…
    Sometimes it feels like gratefulness and sorrow mixed together.
    So many beautiful things here and yet we don’t always get “IT” until we grow older or grow up…It’s bitter sweet.

    Your a beautiful woman and appreciated by many…
    May God Bless you and your endeavors…

  34. Desiring “to catch all the things that matter”–what a beautiful phrase. I am reminded of a phrase of Elton Trueblood who wrote that we are often like cut flowers. They are beautiful for a time but wither. But a flower with roots lasts. The things that last are eternal. Though there are dark days, there are lights all around us.

  35. I cry all the time Jane. I cry for all the cats here that were dumped by heartless owners. And no one cares. No amount of begging those money grubbing national rescues helps them either. If I had 200 dogs on my country street they would help but it’s just cats so they don’t care.

  36. I loved this blog as I fully related to it. Someone had sent it to me through Facebook. As a result, I wrote a blog on it.

    Love and happiness –

  37. Dear Ms Fonda,

    I am greateful for your post. I have a friend who also pregnant. First time when I heard that, I started crying. Because I knew how important that baby was for my friend. Being mother, you, of course were moved hearing a words of wisdom. You don’t need to meet someone in person, to understand one simple thing: how kind this person is. And that person is you, Ms Fonda.

    Talking about animals: this is a very specific subject for me. We had a very ugly winter in Toronto. It was blackout for almost 7 days. I have a cat. Due to the icy rain and snow storm we had lost the power. In my house, there was no heat, not hot water. But this story is not about me. I had so many places to go and stay for a while, or to sleep in warm bed. But the problem is all my friends are having a dogs. Many people laughed at me saying “Why I just dont leave a cat home alone, and stay at my friend’s house?” But I said: I can’t leave my cat in cold place alone. I better stay with her, and warm her up somehow to make sure that she won’t freeze to death. No worries, she is ok, and did not get sick. But the reason I am telling you this story is: as human being: we must love and support the animals. Because they are not as strong and powerful as they seem.

    Ms Fonda,
    Thank you for everything.

  38. This is my first comment on Jane Fonda’s inspiring blog site. Thank you Jane. Now I have a place to express myself with like-minded people. I can no longer view elephants (any creature) being abused. My passions / life’s mission is sharing our pets, especially dogs with those who can’t see theirs anymore (pet assisted therapy). I agree. Turn off what puts our emotions and energy in chains. Get up, and do one small (or big) thing everyday that is a challenge and makes a difference. Be well all, Author, Awareness Centered Training – ACT a dog training book that brings peace of mind to dog parents too, breathing in nose-to-navel, ah-ha.

  39. I’m still blown away to be on your blog…i feel honored to be able to read what you yourself write on personal/public issues … im new to the blogisphere i guess it shows..That was funny what you said in your Crying blog…about ” dump me in a hole”…maybe you know…gorilllas when they’re about to die find a hole in a tree and slip inside to die inside the trunk…away from predators and probably to become one with their favorite things. I always thought that was the way to go.
    Second, somewhere in the past I was reading about how you were wondering how you sat on that anti-aircraft gun and then that picture got taken. And then the spin and license to misinterpret began. And you said you never could understand why you did THAT (as opposed to something else) but after great thought I think I know why. My first disclaimer is of course, It was just the media so do we even know that those were your words, including you saying you had a sort of ignorant social privilidged mindset ( i guess meaning you were not aware that the military was the ONLY job opportunity for some/many ). But check this out…this is my guess ( 1) You were just coming out of an over-sexed mindset/ marriage/ movie career that may have affected your entire being/ subconciousness into a very disturbing reality, warfare…perhaps on innocent people. and 2) Barbarella…Remember how she sits on the duran-duran and BREAKS it. Maybe subconciously you thought you could sit on the anti-aircraft machine and break it, just break the whole war machine forever. That is wishful thinking, but very noble and certainly worth trying. Of course you did a million other worthwhile things but just in case you never thought of that one, I thought i would do my part and tell my thoughts on the matter. Now we can both die peacefull. amen

  40. Jane, today has been very emotional for me and I find I am brought to tears much easier now. Your insights have been helpful, I feel that I am opening up as well. That said, I found your interview with Barbara Walters about your previous book “my life till now” and it was quite moving.
    I so appreciated your passion, your insights, and your ability to verbalize your own experience. Somehow, you made me see myself a little clearer. I can’t wait to get your book.

  41. I don’t see anything wrong with this crying unless it makes you uncomfortable or others around you don’t tolerate it well. You know, I wonder if some of this wasn’t just under the surface of much of your acting over the years, and one reason why we loved you so much. Some actors make us want to take care of them, playing the orphan role in our hearts, and maybe there’s something akin to this in your presentation that makes us want to protect you. I think this translates into really paying close attention to you. You do command a lot of attention. You own a bit of fragility, unguarded receptiveness to life which is exciting.

    The connectedness to the world you described feels to me like a spiritual shift. It seems like one way to be at greater peace in the world, with greater acceptance for things we might normally resist without this wider perspective.

    Darling elephant photo with the boy.

  42. I like this, I’m starting to relate to this!

  43. Jane it seems to me this “crying” is shared with many of the female race. And I thought I was the only one…..!! So thanks, I am not alone, regardless if this be a blessing or a curse. I can not say it any better than Rumi:
    There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love.
    ~Rumi Gratefully Yours, Linda

    • OMG Linda, That is so perfect. Of course Rumi would explain the power of tears. I adore Rumi. Thanks for sharing. xx

  44. Hi Jane,

    I’m writing on behalf of artist, author, and illustrator Lisa Congdon to inquire about obtaining your permission for her to hand-letter an excerpt of this essay to publish in her forthcoming book on getting older and thriving. The book will be published by Chronicle Books in 2017. Please let me know how we should best discuss this further. I’m more than happy to share the details! My email is [email protected].

    Thank you so much for your consideration! Hoping to hear from you soon.

    Kristin Wilson

    Studio Manager
    Lisa Congdon Art & Illustration

    • Kristin, I will have to ask the editor of LENNY for permission. Back to you soon. xx

  45. Hi Jane,

    Thanks so much! For some reason, I’m just seeing this! If it’s helpful, the excerpt she’d like permission to letter all or part of is: “I find my emotions are way more accessible than they were when I was younger and I’ve come to feel it has to do with age. I have become so wonderfully, terribly aware of time, of how little of it I have left; how much of it is behind me, and everything becomes so precious. With age, I am able to appreciate the beauty in small things more than when I was younger perhaps because I pay attention more. I feel myself becoming part of everything, as if I bleed into other people’s joy and pain.” It’s beautiful.

    Looking forward to hearing back!

    Thanks again,

  46. Ms.Fonda, I am only 18 years old but relate to you sooo much. I am a cryer at the best of times, good times and bad. But it warms my heart to see here that there are so many people just like me, and you! People who can cry tears for other humans happiness, people who can cry for the sadness in life, people who cry for hope and people who cry just because we’re hormonal. I love how you appreciate the world around you.
    I thank god every day for the good in the world and for gracing us with a lady like you, to look up to, to be inspired by and to love. I adore you Ms.Fonda- you are simply AMAZING X

  47. I just turned 60 but have referenced this blog post often over the years since its posting. It’s high time its author knew that. Thank you for taking the time to craft and share it.

  48. So I just watched CNN’s Ted Turner retrospective, and there you are crying again :-)))
    You’re be best. I so get it.

  49. Hi Jane
    I have just listened to your audio book “My life so far “
    I about will turn 55 March 1 and have hit rock bottom , as my life so far has been a mountain of pain and self destructive behaviours. I wrote my parents and siblings the same letter of my life story six months ago and have only heard back from one of my sisters . The rest of my family didn’t respond after I told my story of the abuse I suffered as told no one when I should have . Your booked has helped me and so much of your life has been like mine and admire that you did finally find peace . I am on that journey now in my life and I hope I can heal before I lose the ones who do love me .
    Thanks for your words of wisdom
    Joanne Lawlis (nee) Woodward Ontario Canada

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